Unus Annus: Month 6

*All typos are present in the original source and have been preserved for the sake of history*

[13/04/20] How to NOT be the Perfect Boyfriend

**TW: Please be aware that in this video we discuss abuse and unhealthy relationship dynamics.**

https://www.domesticshelters.org/resources/national-global-organizations

https://www.acf.hhs.gov/fysb/resource/help-fv

[14/04/20] Mark and Ethan Find the Lost City of El Dorado

hundreds of brave treasure hunters have attempted to find it, but none have succeeded… until now.

[15/04/20] Mark and Ethan Bet Everything on a Wikipedia Race

A Wikipedia Race (aka Wiki Races) is the ultimate test of skill that 2 individuals could possible have. But with this race… the stakes are almost too high to endure.

Round 1: “Tardigrade” to “Anemia.” Mark Wins.

Round 2: “Nenad Brnovic” to “Aulos,Ariege.” Mark Wins.

Round 3: “List of Airports in the British Virgin Islands” to “Continuum (John Mayer Album).” Mark Wins.

Round 4: “Francisco de Paula Rodrigues Alves” to “Miss Earth Austria.” Nobody Wins.

[16/04/20] The Creepiest Videos on Youtube

Sometimes creepiness transcends mere words or images… sometimes only grainy footage from the 1990’s can truly express the definition of fear.

[17/04/20] Help Us Break a YouTube World Record

Subscribe NOW ►►https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEM4OLpbpe_UlLUIsVbDYRA?sub_confirmation=1

Featuring: Norbert Moses

[18/04/20] 2 Men 200 Accents

Close your eyes… how are you still reading this? It doesn’t matter. Let your ears take you on a journey around the globe as we showcase our incredible talent for accents.

The Accents: France, Scotland, Ireland, England

[19/04/20] The Illuminati: Do They Really Exist?

Close your eyes… how are you still reading this? It doesn’t matter. Let your ears take you on a journey around the globe as we showcase our incredible talent for accents.

Answer: No, of course not…

[20/04/20] Using Google Maps to Find the Lost City of Atlantis

Mermaids. Piles of Gold. Talking Fish. All this and more lie before us in the great city of Atlantis… and today we find it.

[21/04/20] Reading YOUR Scariest True Stories

Mermaids. Piles of Gold. Talking Fish. All this and more lie before us in the great city of Atlantis… and today we find it.

[22/04/20] Mark and Ethan Take a Personality Test

What type of human being is the joint creature known as Unus Annus? What characteristics would this amalgamation of horror entail? Only one way to find out…

Joint Personality: INFP-A

[23/04/20] Will AI Soon Take Over Humanity As We Know It?

Robots. Androids. AI. It’s not all that far away… and neither is the revolution of said robots… and the end of humanity…. oh well!

Answer: No. Of course not…

[24/04/20] Running Internet Drama Through Google Translate

There are many universal languages. Love. Music. Art. …Tea? Using the most advanced computational technologies, Mark and Ethan determine if internet drama transcends the limitations of the written word.

[25/04/20] The Secret Unus Annus No-Touchy-Touchy Handshake

WARNING: Only the elite of the elite can even SURVIVE ATTEMPTING this incredible secret Unus Annus Handshake! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!! #HandMyAnnus#DanceMyAnnusOff

The Handshake: Go to shake “Heyyyyyyyyyy”, Right hand up clockwise Dr Strange spiral, Elevated (mime) pull the balloon twice, Eat it like fire (full extension), Spit out the pee hands out, Clutch beard made of dog hair without touching your face, Punch the wall with right hand, Dodge to the left, Archery pull and fire, Rochambeau to see who dies, If you die hands to chest “ah ooh ee”, If you live open hands like a Bible “here lies my friend” and bring hand up to revive, If dead pull self up and alive, Left hand up and counterclockwise Dr Strange spiral, Hands together with spread fingers “Memento Mori”

Note: If that made zero sense to you, sorry. You had to be there.

[26/04/20] Two Male Men Judge Female Women on Their Beauty

We did it with men, so its only fair we do it with women too: Let’s find out what TRUE beauty is.

[27/04/20] Bored? Press This Button.

‘ya ever been bored?

Press it @ https://www.boredbutton.com

[28/04/20] Don’t Go in the Ocean. Ever.

The Ocean is a terrible place full of deadly creatures that will eat you without a moment’s notice. You should never go there. Ever. Under any circumstances. It’s an evil place. Full of evil creatures like SCP-3000 and the Loch Ness Monster. It’s evil…

[29/04/20] We Explore the Most MYSTERIOUS Mysteries of our Wildly Mysterious Mystery Moon of Mysteries

what mysteries does our mysterious moon hold? does it hold mysteries that our mysterious minds could not even comprehend? Are there so many mysteries on our mysterious moon that they have gone above what it even means to be a mystery??? Well… here we are to find out.

[30/04/20] We Looked at Unus Annus Memes

Did you know Unus Annus has its own subreddit? We kinda forgot.

[01/05/20] Is Mark a Masochist?

Here at Unus Annus, we’ve explored countless mysteries over the past few months. We’ve discovered El Dorado, Atlantis, and even revealed the horrors of our very own oceans. But no mystery is NEARLY as mysterious as Mark’s private life. Let’s explore!

Answer: Yes

[02/05/20] What the Hell is a Pink Trombone?

You have a pink trombone lurking inside of you… it’s desperate to get out. And if you listen close enough… it’ll speak to you.

Answer: Its a 3-D printed throat. Yes, really

[03/05/20] Professional Fetish Scientists Rank the Best/Worst Fetishes of 2020

The world is full of fetishes. From the mainstream to the obscure, there’s something for everybody out there. But what’s the most obscure one we can find?

Note: Provided your fetish isn’t a crime, it is valid. You do you.

[04/05/20] Mark and Ethan Desperately Try to Feel Something

Mark and Ethan scour the internet to try and find videos that make them FEEL something before their hearts stop

[05/05/20] An AI Generates Our Worst Nightmare

We dream of a future where A.I. will help humanity flourish. This is not one of those times.

[06/05/20] Are Reptilian Humanoids Living Among Us?

They could be anywhere… lurking… waiting… hunting

Answer: No. Genuinely no.

[07/05/20] Like It or Not…This is What the New Human Looks Like

Humanity is still evolving… still changing… “MUTANTS” as some know them to be. Humans with real life super powers. Surely fiction, right? But could they living among us today…?

[08/05/20] Eating Only Onions for 24 Hours: How Many Onions Does it Take to Kill a Man?

As Shrek once told me in a dark alley on a stormy night, “Onions have layers…” That message has been cemented into my mind among other things Shrek whispered into my ear. But in this video we discover the true versatility of the mythical Onion and if there is such a thing as too much Onion.

Answer: We don’t know but don’t try and find out.

[09/05/20] Unus Annus ASMR

Unus AnnuSMR. You wanted this. You asked for this. You deserve this. Turn out the lights, turn up the volume, and get ready to relax. You deserve this.

[10/05/20] We Attempted to Create THICC Water

damn water you kinda THICC huh? ah haaahhhhhhhhhhhh

Ethan’s Thicc Water: Water and Flour

Mark’s Thicc Water: Del Monte Sweetcorn Preservative Water

[11/05/20] Making Our Own Gravestones to Prepare For Our Inevitable Demise

We’re all going to have a gravestone someday, so why not create ours preemptively and really make it our own?

[12/05/20] How Tall Can a Human Get?: An Impartial Review by 2 Average Height Men

Two men of extremely adequate height discuss the upper limits of humanity’s height potential. Not that it matters. Height is more a curiosity than a social necessity. There’s nothing wrong with being not incredibly tall. Height is a spectrum. And we are on the highest point of the bell curve. So if you think about it… we’re actually pretty “up there.” Which is a synonym for tall. So through the transitive property, one could say that we are tall.

The Tallest: Robert Woodlow at 8 foot 11 inches

Signed: Your friendly neighbourhood queer

One thought on “Unus Annus: Month 6

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